The Night Before Christmas

    It’s funny how when you look back over the years remembering Christmas pasts, you rarely think about what you received. The treasured memories instead are of special traditions and family members.  I’ve been trying to decide which Christmas over the last 47 years has been my most meaningful and can’t peg it down to just one. There are so many traditions and people woven into this special day that it’s hard separating them by years.

     One tradition that is changing for my Mom’s side of the family is celebrating Christmas Eve at my Grandma’s house. For the last 45 years, excluding the year we went to visit my Dad’s family in upstate New York, I have made my way over the highway and through Laurens Road to Grandma’s. This is our first Christmas without her. Although we’ll still be gathering at the same home, it’s not hers anymore. My aunt has taken up residence there and Grandma will only be with us in spirit.

     My Uncle David will also be sorely missed. He passed away suddenly two months before Grandma. It will be difficult not hearing Grandma’s British accent declaring “Horsefeathers!” towards any tale she didn’t believe, or my uncle playing Christmas carols on his beloved guitar. These were common occurrences over the years. The sweet familiarity of family is a gift in itself.

     Since my siblings and I are now married and have children of our own, my parents started new delightful traditions at their home. After leaving Grandma’s house we head to Mom and Dad’s. Once there, we unload all of the gifts and begin stuffing everyone’s stockings before we settle in for a long night of fun.

     I know this may sound incredibly tortuous for most people, but we then begin opening gifts one at a time, starting from youngest to oldest. With 17 people now in our family, it takes quite some time. But we relish every moment.

     One of the first gifts the grandchildren open is pajamas from my parents, even a pair for my niece’s husband. They immediately run and change into them, laughing with delight as they run down the hall. Once settled back down after their fashion show, we start unwrapping again.

     Mom and Dad also give each child, their spouse and grandchild a special ornament to open that represents something about that person. It’s amusing to see what everyone receives each year. After all the presents are opened we make a mad dash to the stockings, unwrapping the little gifts all at once. It’s pure chaos, but so much fun.

     Once every package has been unwrapped, the kids sing a Christmas carol of their choice into a recordable book, but not before listening to all of the previous years’ songs first. It usually takes several attempts before they’re happy with the final product.

     Before everyone packs up to leave, we make sure each family has a photo taken on the den steps. Amidst groans from the husbands, we finally conclude the picture taking with a group shot of everyone. These photos have become precious to us over the years as we’re reminded how much our family has grown.

    When we head home around midnight, I breathe a sigh of sweet weariness that I wouldn’t trade for anything in the world, knowing we will share more precious moments with my husband’s family the next day. I know someday all of this will come to an end, only leaving distant memories. But I’m so grateful for these wonderful moments created with loved ones and look forward with hope toward even sweeter ones to come.

     Change is inevitable and sometimes painful, especially during the holidays. So as we approach yet another Christmas, let’s live in the moment and enjoy the gift of the special people God has placed in our life. Let’s put aside any differences we may have and praise God for the love He has given us through others. And if the change you are encountering this year is one that feels greater than you can bear, I pray especially that God will show His love to you in an amazing way; just as He did for each of us on that night of Jesus’ miraculous birth over 2000 years ago.

Merry Christmas! 

Mirror, Mirror

Mirror, Mirror on the wall

Who’s the fairest of them all?

    

     This familiar prose spoken by Snow White’s wicked stepmother is something women are all too familiar with. We ask ourselves this question over and over again as we wonder if we’re good enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, smart enough.

     I for one am sick of it. I’m sick of comparing myself to other’s standards because that’s what the world says I should do. I’m sick of the women, teens and even little girls I’m surrounded by struggling constantly, feeling hopeless to attain the perfect standard our society has set before us.

     When we look back over the decades and even centuries, we see beauty defined much differently than we do today. A century or two ago you were considered poor and undesirable if you were too thin. Now it’s all the rage. We walk by mirrors in department stores and are afraid to look at ourselves. We’re afraid we may not like what we see. But we look anyway and then are disappointed in the woman staring back at us.

     It makes me want to cry. We are enough. Christ designed each of us uniquely for a specific purpose. We aren’t supposed to look like clones. We are each beautiful in our own right and especially in God’s sight.  We are fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14). Fearfully can be translated with heart- felt intensity or great reverence. I can’t help but wonder if that’s from God’s point of view. I believe He feels heart-felt intensity as He creates each one of us. Wonderfully means unique, set apart or uniquely marvelous.

     How awesome is that? When God looks at us He doesn’t compare us to others. He knows He created us to look the way we do for a reason. It’s not just by happenstance that some girls seem to get all of the “good genes” while others feel they fall woefully short. None of us fall short. We are ALL beautiful no matter if we’re fat or skinny, have acne, stringy or frizzy hair, big thighs or big feet. God’s word does not say we are perfect, it says we are wonderful. And this side of heaven we can’t hope to attain more than that. I don’t know about you, but having someone call me wonderful sounds pretty great to me. I’ll take it, especially when it comes from my Creator.

     One thing we cannot know as we look at the seemingly perfect people is how they feel inside. They may look like they have it all on the outside, smiling and beautiful. But they also may be dying on the inside. They may think they don’t measure up or that others won’t love them if they stop trying to be perfect. The old adage is true, you cannot judge a book by it’s cover. As the younger generation says – don’t be hatin’- because you have no idea what they’re dealing with every day. Love everyone. After all, that’s what our Heavenly Father asks us to do.

     I want to end with a story I heard years ago. I believe it’s true, but can’t confirm it.

     There once was a little girl who had brown eyes. She always wished she had been born with blue eyes. It wasn’t just a passing thought because she thought about it frequently wondering why so many other girls were blessed with beautiful blue eyes while she was stuck with plain brown eyes.

     Years later she became a missionary among a people who had predominantly brown eyes. She found these people welcomed and trusted her because of her brown eyes. A blue-eyed missionary would have brought suspicion among them. She was then grateful God had blessed her with brown eyes so she could share Christ’s love with them.

     We may never know this side of heaven why we are made the way we are, but we should ask God for the ability to trust Him and continually look for His unique purpose for us.

     So, the next time you walk by one of those mirrors in a department store (or even in your home for that matter) try saying, “Thank you, God, that I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am your beautiful masterpiece.” Because you are.

For we are God’s workmanship, 

created in Christ Jesus to do good works,

which God prepared in advance for us to do. ~ Ephesians 2:10